lousy lazy

i have no idea why am i so.. lazy to write anything lately.
i bring a journal almost everywhere i go (yeah whatever, my secret's out), and i doodle in it a lot, especially in class. (well it's better than sleeping in class. at least i'm listening to the lecture.) but i don't write anything particularly important in it.

i have no idea why my recent posts are in english a lot, i guess i just ramble easier in english.

i have no idea why i can never concentrate enough in my classes..
well i do concentrate, mind you, for a good hour in the beginning. but as classes progress i seem to lose interest.
i can never understand why my campus can schedule classes from 7 to 11.30 am straight without any break.
because i, for one, just can't keep up with it.
i'm not complaining that it makes me tired, i just feel that it's not effective for me who has an incredibly short-attention span.

i have no idea why i can never study even when some freakin important exam is just around the corner.

i have no idea why i can lounge in bed for hours doing nothing.

i have no idea why i can have not-particularly-important conversations and just laugh on ourselves for hours with him.

i have no idea why i can't get myself to thoroughly read all those thick textbooks and slides i have, while i can actually devour dozens of comics or BSC books less than a day.

but i accept all these facts of my lousy laziness, however appalling they seem.
i really do try to change. and it's not like i do all that all freaking 24 hours of my day.
and it's not like i don't do anything else worthwhile.

i watch a lot of movies. and i don't cut class to do so. and i write the reviews too (although obviously some late. whatever.)

i join in my friends for study group sessions, eventhough i sleep through most of it. whatever. i can't help myself. i'm human, i have flaws.


whatever.
i'll go back to sleep now.
hff.